Life is all about balance - Maarten Schafer
Life balances what we can control and what we cannot. Learn to live life between effort and letting go.
Have you ever stopped to think about what keeps our lives in harmony? It’s the subtle, ongoing balance between the forces we can control and those we simply cannot. Grasping this balance isn’t just a skill; it’s an essential part of navigating life. Today, I want to share how embracing effort and surrender has shaped my perspective and actions.
In the grand scheme of things, we often fixate on outcomes. We strive, plan, and push to mold our lives according to our desires. And there’s value in that — it shows our commitment to shaping our paths. But here’s a realization I’ve come to after many twists and turns: not everything is under our control, nor should it be.
Think about a time when you’ve planned something to the smallest detail, only for it to unravel. It could be as simple as a weekend outing foiled by sudden rain or as significant as a job opportunity that fell through despite your best efforts. It’s frustrating, right? In these moments, I’ve learned that the magic lies not in relentless control but in our ability to adapt, breathe, and accept the uncontrollable with grace.
The most gratifying moments in my life were not when I clinched a deal or won a reward. Instead, they came when I found the courage to let go of what I couldn’t change. I remember struggling with a project at work that was impacted by so many external factors that it seemed doomed. The stress was unbearable. The turning point came when I acknowledged that I had done all I could and that the outcome was no longer in my hands. That shift in mindset — from gripping tightly to letting go — was liberating. It didn’t just ease my stress; it clarified that “letting go” is sometimes another form of action often overlooked.
Living with this balance means understanding when to put your foot on the gas and when to take it off. It’s recognizing that our peace often comes from our response to life, not just our command over it. If we constantly fight against the tide, insisting on control at all times, we’re likely to tire ourselves out without moving forward.
So, how do we cultivate this balance? It starts with awareness. Pay attention to the moments you’re pushing too hard against an immovable obstacle. Reflect on whether your efforts align with your capabilities and the reality of the situation. This doesn’t mean you give up at the first sign of resistance. Instead, it’s about knowing when perseverance turns into futile stubbornness.
Next, practice flexibility. Life is unpredictable, and rigidity only sets us up for disappointment. Learn to pivot and adapt. Sometimes, our alternative paths lead us to unexpected successes and teach us valuable lessons that straightforward journeys might not.
Lastly, embrace the concept of ‘good enough.’ Perfection is a myth, often an unattainable standard that can cause more harm than good. Striving for excellence is commendable, but not at the cost of your mental health or happiness. Sometimes, doing your best is good enough, and that’s okay.
Life is a delicate dance between making things happen and letting things happen. As I continue on my journey, I am constantly learning to balance my urge to control with my ability to surrender. It is in this balance that I find my peace, my strength, and my greatest lessons. Life, after all, isn’t just about the destination; it’s about finding equilibrium on the path we walk.
“Quite some years ago, I started traveling the planet. I thought this would teach me something about the world we live in. I was wrong… It taught me something about myself. It changed me. And nothing will ever be black-and-white again.”
– Maarten Schafer –
